


Get Home

by MayaThisIsMadness



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Confession, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, First Kiss, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Homesickness, Insecurity, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-06
Updated: 2017-02-06
Packaged: 2018-09-22 11:42:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,191
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9606197
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MayaThisIsMadness/pseuds/MayaThisIsMadness
Summary: "You want to know how someone like me could like someone like you?  It's easy.  For someone like me, someone distant and sarcastic and abrasive, probably one of the easiest things for someone like me to do is fall for someone like you."





	

**Author's Note:**

> "This is just another night  
> And we've had many of them  
> To the morning we're cast out  
> But I know I'll land here again."
> 
> -Bastille, "Get Home"

It wasn't so bad at first, the aching feeling in Lance's chest when he thought of home. It took maybe a month for it to really sink in. When it did, though, it was prone to irregular bursts of intensity. It came in waves, pulling him up and down like an indecisive tide separate from the influences of the sun and moon. 

For days he could be fine, only remembering the warmth of the beach and the smell of his mom's cooking at nights as he tried to fall asleep. 

Other times it would really pull him underneath the water. He'd be eating a bowl of breakfast goo and suddenly look at his spoon and realize it wasn't cereal. Or he'd be walking down a hall and casually look out the window and realize it had been a night sky for weeks. Small things he would notice made something in him drop to his stomach and took days to shake off. Of course by then something else would have set it off all over again.

There was really no telling how long one of these bouts of homesickness would last. If they were really busy, he could bury himself in whatever the task at hand was and shake it off pretty easily. Unfortunately, the ship had been pretty quiet, as they were between missions and had no real lead on Zarkon’s empire. Something he couldn't even remember had started it off a few days ago and he'd been down ever since. 

This time had been different, though. It sunk it's teeth into his mind, infecting it like a parasite. It kept his eyes wide open as soon as he hit his mattress at night. It pulled them closed when he was supposed to be awake and alert. His sleep pattern was a disaster. His performance in training was plummeting. He was snapping at anyone that even mentioned his game being off. 

All in all, he was a human wreck. He had to stop hanging out with Hunk, a usually comfort, because it was so blaringly obvious what awful shape he was in and Hunk was vocally concerned. Soon, the questions started coming from all angles after he messed up target practice during training. Everyone knew shooting was his strong suit, so when he missed every single shot, they were all reasonably concerned. 

The first questions came from Hunk, then Shiro, then Coran, then eventually Allura and Pidge, but he steadily ignored them all. He insisted he was fine. Tired, that's all. He'd be better tomorrow.

But he wasn't. For days.

The group slowly grew shades darker. Everyone shared weary looks when Lance missed perfect joke-making opportunities. He tried to lighten up when he noticed the uncertain glances from his team, but it came off empty and distant so eventually he stopped trying to pretend he was fine.

He was polishing his bayard in the corner of the training room when Shiro approached him. 

“Look Lance,” Shiro started, “We all know something is up. It doesn't have to be me, but please, open up to someone. We need you back in top condition. We're a team and we're worried about you.”

Lance nodded, “Let me just take a break, I'll talk to Hunk or something later.”

He put his bayard down and made his way out of the training room, leaving the group looking after him dressed with concerned faces. 

He found himself walking toward the lion hangar. After he stopped seeking out Hunk, he found himself spending more and more time with Blue. She was an immeasurable comfort through it all. 

Once he got in, he immediately felt her in his head. She provided a foreign feeling of comfort. It wasn't the same as a hug from his little sister or hand ruffling his hair from his older siblings, but it was something.

He sat by her right paw, pulling his legs in and resting his chin on his knees. 

“Why is this so hard, Blue?” He asked. 

She gave a deep purr in return. It wasn't words, per say, or even a coherent thought, just a feeling of companionship that rushed through him.

He sighed. Her presence only went so far, and he quickly felt the joy of it slipping away. 

He had no idea how long he spent sitting there, looking up at Blue contemplatively. They had artificial clocks on the ship, but even time felt different so far from home.

Suddenly there was a sound from behind him and he turned back. 

“Oh, hey,” said Keith, “I was just coming to check on Red.”

Lance nodded and turned back, putting his head back on his knees.

After a moment, Keith stalked past across the room. Out of the corner of his eye, Lance watched as Keith disappeared inside the mouth of the red lion.

He didn't make a lot of noise and Lance nearly forgot he was there at all until Red leaned down to let him out again. Keith passed by wordlessly, but the automatic door never slid open. Lance was about to turn around and see what Keith was doing when the air shifted around him. Keith sat, mirroring Lance's position, to his right. 

He didn't look up and Keith kept his eyes trained forward. Neither said anything for the longest moment, just sat in a weighted silence.

Keith hadn't said anything to him through all this, but Lance couldn't really blame him. He hadn't exactly started them off on a good foot. But Keith hadn't push to get past it either, rather, settled into their rival routine like it was normal to bicker with a complete stranger.

Over their time on the ship, however, their words lost most of their bite. After all the missions and battles they fought together, they had slowly started drifting into a different territory. They never talked about it though, both just kind of accepting it. 

Eventually, Keith was the one to break the silence.

“I can't wormhole you home,” Keith stated.

Lance glanced over at him before focusing his gaze back toward Blue.

“So I'm not gonna pretend like all of your problems can just be solved,” he heard Keith swallow, “And I'm also not gonna pretend like talking about it is gonna make it all better either. But, it will help a little and-”

Keith broke off and looked over, considering Lance, who stared blankly forward, before looking away. 

“-and I- we miss you. I know I'm probably not the person you'd want to talk to about this, and I guess it would be fine if you just told me to beat it, but you need to stop holding this all in. It's gonna tear you apart. It- it is tearing you apart.”

Lance didn't say anything. Keith didn't leave, but didn't pry anymore either. 

After a moment, Lance took a deep breath.

“Last week was my little sister’s fifteenth birthday. I missed her quinceanera and she doesn't even know why.”

Lance kept his focus trained forward, but could feel it as indigo eyes settled on him.

Lance waited a moment, but when Keith didn't respond, he continued, “I've been gone for months. They could have me declared dead by now. My mom…”

Lance put his forehead down on his drawn in knees and closed his eyes. 

Hesitantly, he felt Keith's hand on his back, slowly starting to rub in smooth circles. 

“They’re never going to know what happened to me.”

Keith leaned forward a bit from where he was already facing Lance, forcing him to look up at him, “Yes they will. I know once you get back, all you'll be able to do is brag about saving the universe.”

Lance huffed at that and looked away, “If.”

Keith wrinkled his eyebrows, “What?”

“You said once we get back…”

“Yeah,” Keith said, “We're going to get back.”

“You can't know that-”

“You're going to get back, Lance!” he yelled, and Lance looked up at him startled. Keith continued softer, “Trust me, we're going to get you home. I'm sure of it.”

The look in Keith's eyes was fire and Lance was almost scared by the shier intensity in his voice, not to mention the determination in his gaze. He weakly nodded back and Keith visibly relaxed.

“You're gonna get through this, Lance,” Keith said, and weirdly it sounded less like a reassurance to Lance as it did a pledge. Like an affirmation, something he repeated to himself daily to reassure him that the statement was true.

“And what if I do,” Lance replied after a moment in a hushed tone, “and all of this didn't even matter.”

“What are you talking about?”

“What if I come back after years of being gone with nothing to show for it?” He asked, “Where will I be then?”

“Lance,” Keith said, some of the fire from before was sparking behind his eyes and Lance prepared himself.

Keith put a hand on his knee as he turned to face him more directly, Lance tried not to hyperfocus on the touch as he dropped his hands to his sides.

“Lance,” he said again, “You already have something to show for it. Look at how far we've come.”

“But all these big plans and great battles, that was Shiro, and Pidge, and Allura… and you. I haven't done anything except be a leg to stand on.”

“Lance,” Keith repeated his name, the sound becoming a life raft falling from Keith's lips that Lance was desperately clinging to, “You have been so much more than that. You were the one who shot Sendak in the castle after saving Coran. The one with the calculative plans. The one that saved that entire mermaid village. You're our sharp shooter, yeah? You're observant and moral and good.”

Keith was leaning forward and his eyes insisted that Lance believe them, and he wanted to, but-.

Keith's hand squeezed his knee again, “You- you hold this team together, Lance. You're our glue.”

Keith moved his hand from Lance's leg and brought it up to his face, hovering an inch away.

“C-Could I…?” Keith asked, suddenly a little unsure.

Lance blinked and realized his cheeks were wet and his vision slightly blurry. When had that happened?

He didn't say yes, but pressed his face into Keith's reluctant palm, his legs fell from their drawn in position to the floor. Skin touched skin and Lance exhaled as he looked up at Keith. A thumb began slowly dragging across his cheek bone, smoothing away the tears.

Keith's eyes held him captive. They begged him to see what Keith saw, implored him not to see himself the way he did. But he couldn't, he just… couldn’t.

He barely choked out the words, “What if that's not enough?”

He could see Keith actually crumble. His face fell and he dropped into a crippled slouch. The look that rose up and tore into Lance was a kind of broken passion he'd never seen before, much less from Keith. 

“Of course it is! How can you say that?” Keith's voice was a messy mix of emotions, but ultimately disbelieving.

“I- I just-"

“No,” Keith said, readjusting his legs so he could turn and face Lance directly, “You can't- you can't think like that! Do you even understand how much that hurts me?”

“Hurts... you?”

“Yes!” Keith said, his hand moving to Lance's neck, pulling him closer so their faces were all the other could see, “I know this isn't about me, but I tried listening to this and Lance. I can't listen to you talk about yourself this way like- like you're just some tool that's not even working right. I don't understand how you could see yourself that way!”

Lance broke eye contact, but before he could look away, Keith pulled him back with his other hand, holding him in steady focus as he continued.

“I don't get how you can't see what you're worth to us. T-to me. The loyalty, the stability, the-the compassion. You are strong and capable and, fuck, Lance, your invaluable, how can't you see that?”

Lance cracked and he was pouring out every orifice. He let his forehead fall into Keith's, legs straightened out, and he hiccuped. Keith automatically began rubbing his thumb soothingly along his hairline, taking deep measured breaths in an attempt to calm Lance down. 

He loosened his clenched eyelids and tried to level his breathing with Keith's. 

After he settled down, melting into the way their lungs were breathing in complete synchronization, their chests rising and falling as one, he opened his eyes. Keith's were already looking back into his and they shared a meaningful look. Lance raised his eyebrows slightly and Keith flickered his eyes down to Lance's mouth. His heart jumped.

Keith leaned in, bumping their noses, taking hesitant stops along the way, making sure Lance could pull away if he wanted to. But he didn't. Keith had to adjust over him slightly to get close enough before his upper lip touched his. Sharply, he inhaled and Keith paused. 

Neither moved. Lance didn't want to pull away and Keith was reluctant to push forward. 

Lance let his eyes flutter closed as he closed the space between them, capturing the lip that had brushed his between his own. Keith let out a relieved sigh and Lance felt his posture soften. 

It was soft and rough, the way their mouths carefully grazed each other but their skin rubbed with persistent friction. 

Lance's fingers curled at their place on the floor on either side of him. As they pulled apart, his lips tingled. Keith ran his hands up his neck, threading caressing fingers through his hair. 

They both opened their eyes and Lance was immediately assaulted by the purely affectionate smile that spread across Keith's face. He had never seen him look so at ease. Lance slowly mirrored his expression and Keith's smiled widened even further somehow. 

He leaned forward and kissed Lance another time, lightly across his mouth. Then the corner of his mouth. Then peppered slight kisses across his face and over his nose, paying special attention to each freckle in the constellations that played across his cheeks.

Lance found himself giggle deliriously and put his hands softly on Keith's chest, pushing him away lightly.

Keith immediately paused, and looked, honestly, a little terrified at Lance's gesture, but Lance just shook his head and smiled reassuringly. He bumped their noses, but the light was slowly draining from his face as his smile wavered and fell.

Keith moved his hands to each side of Lance's face, waiting.

Lance sighed, “Why?”

“What?” Keith said, eyes taking back their intent concern.

“I don't get how some like,” he pulled back to wave a hand around Keith, “ _you_ could like someone like me. I- I thought you hated me.”

“I could never hate you,” Keith said, “You- you…”

“Are much better with words than you?”

“There,” Keith said, “That's the Lance.”

Lance breathed a laugh.

“I'm serious. You have all these doubts and insecurities but you're still so- so bright. You want to know how someone like me could like someone like you? It's easy. For someone like me, someone distant and sarcastic and abrasive, probably one of the easiest things for someone like me to do is fall for someone like you.”

Lance swallowed as he looked back at Keith, shaking his head a bit at the burning behind his eyes.

“Let me show you,” Keith said.

He leaned forward and kissed Lance again. 

Keith was not a passionate person. He was fiery and intense, sure, but he was not known for emotional expression. Which was why the absolute expressive vigor behind the kiss took Lance completely off guard.

It was sloppy and a little awkward, but what it lacked in finesse, it made up for in its complete surrender to emotion. Keith kissed with purpose. Every movement, every touch, every sound was a portrayal of just how much Lance meant to him. He aimed with every motion to show him just how much he was worth that he couldn't see himself. 

He moved forward to hover over Lance, breaking the kiss briefly to climb onto his lap. He pushed further until Lance was flat on his back and Keith was on top of him. Lance had long since given up control to let Keith do about whatever the heck he wanted as long as he didn't stop. 

Keith pulled away from Lance's mouth to kiss beneath his chin and down his neck, pushing aside his shirt collar to kiss the skin beneath. Lance let out a contented moan and gripped Keith's hair, pulling him back to his mouth. 

Keith let the fire ease to a light flame as their mouths moved in a steady rhythm. He let the intensity slip into something calm and simple. 

When they broke apart, Keith was looking intently down at Lance. Lance met his eyes.

“Thanks, Keith.”

“Oh my gosh, don't thank me.”

“I mean it,” Lance said.

“I know you do,” Keith said, “but trust me, if anybody should be thanking anyone, it's me. You deserve so much better.”

“Huh,” Lance said, “I was going to say the same thing.”

“Maybe we deserve each other.”

Lance pulled Keith's forehead to his, “I hope so.”

Keith hovered there over him until his arms grew tired. They didn't say anything for the longest time, just brewed in their mutual disbelief of what had just happened. 

Eventually, Keith sighed and sat up, pulling Lance up after him. Lance bit his lip as he stared back at Keith.

“You can find me,” said Keith, clearing his throat, “If you ever need to talk about earth or your family or anything. I'm here for you.”

“Thanks. I will.”

Keith nodded, starting to turn away. Lance's hand shot out before he could start walking, “Wait.”

He stood up, facing Keith and taking a step forward. Keith's breathe seemed heavier than normal and since they were so close, Lance could feel it tickle against his skin. He wondered if he'd ever get used to what it did to his stomach.

He carefully took Keith's hand and they both focused on their joined hands.

“Does- what does this mean... for us?”

Keith smirked a bit at Lance, “It means you should probably stop flirting with every slightly attractive alien we find.”

Lance dropped his gaze with a nervous laugh, “Yeah, probably.”

“I mean, if that's what you want,” Keith suddenly started, “I guess I just kind of assumed we are on the same page, do you even-”

Lance was suddenly laughing and Keith was taking so aback by the sound he had missed he forgot to feel surprised.

“Yeah, Keith,” Lance said as he calmed down, “We are definitely on the same page.”

He leaned in and pressed a short confident kiss to his lips. Lance’s usual light was starting to seep back and it had Keith smiling.

“You don't have to worry about me.”

“Don't I?”

Lance kissed him again, slower this time, “Not about this. If there's one thing I'm sure of, it's you.”

“You too.”

“Good.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks guys, this is just self indulgent. Validate me, lol


End file.
